Not so unusual; a song has brought me to the words that I haven't been able to find for quite some time. I'm in the midst of Running to Stand Still (U2).

I have to do something about where I'm going, about where we're going. In order to keep my head up, I'm busy changing on the inside. Feeling like I'm moving way to fast. Not knowing what is and what is not. Learning to follow harder than ever before. And yet, it looks like I'm not going anywhere. It actually looks like I'm going backwards.

I've got to do things I'm not good at; talk without speaking - or listen, cry without weeping - or be empathetic, scream without raising my voice - or give my passion over to Jesus. I have to let the Holy Spirit be me. I know, I'm supposed to do that always.

I took a verse on last year as a challenge. I never knew it's power or really if I would ever actually be faced with it's truth. The challenge seems to have only just begun and I memorized it a year ago already. I memorized it in the NIV, but I like the ESV better.

2Corinthians 10:5
We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.(ESV)

I have listened to much to the lofty opinions of our western abyss. I've listened to much to the lies that sit dormant in my mind; rising up when they see the opportunity to come up against the authority of Christ. There is only one way out. Out - off the path that too many walk, out onto the road that is less traveled and seems so uninviting to this world, and out from the lies that I have so easily swallowed.

I should have known better. I shouldn't have wasted all this time. But this is my time; I'm going to have to make this moment mine. Just know that I'm learning.

The storm has blown up in my eyes and I'll suffer the chill until things have changed.

Pray for me. Wait for me.