Why am I in this place anyway? Why do I have to go through this? Why can't I find peace? When will this start to make sense? How will I ever move beyond my pain?

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.
We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about the hardships we suffered in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many.
2 Corinthians 1:3-11 (emphasis mine)

OK. Let's be honest. None of us are facing death as Paul and his companions did. So, why do we then complain and whine and cry out for relief? Our pain is as real as we know and understand. What a comfort to know that I may not be able to handle that which God has given me - but Jesus can.

I wish that the comfort of others, the ability to teach others, the knowledge to lead souls to Christ, and the comfort of Jesus himself, did not come at such a high price. And yet the price he paid for me could never be matched. Never can I give him what he deserves for saving my selfish, sinful heart. All he wants is me, broken and bruised. In that lies the reason. Without my failures and struggles, I would not come to him at all.

Blessed be the name of the LORD! For he is good! I thank you LORD for that which brings me to my knees before you.

Bounce

We have to train ourselves to bounce away from sin; from that which ensnares our mind, our eyes, and our actions. I was listening to Fred Stoeker on Family Life talk about how he mastered his sinful nature. He said he's not special, he's not better than you or me, he just daily went to battle with sin. He lost a lot, but now says he wins more than he loses. And he reaps benefits; a better marriage, a happier outlook, a fulfilling relationship with Jesus, and a bigger pay check due to the book he wrote to help other men do what he did. Not bad. How can women get in on this one? We too have to bounce away from the temptation to sin.

Start with your mind.
"...we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." 2Corinthians 10:5
It all starts there anyway. Jesus really pounded this home in the Sermon on the Mount. You murder in your mind, you commit adultery in your mind; your motives and your heart are under the judgement of God.
So a thought comes to mind, an image comes to mind, a fantacy comes to mind... check it, and make it captive to the obedience to Christ. This is an endless task.

Make a covenant with your eyes.
"I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl." Job 31:1
Ok, so I would never do that anyway, but the task is the same. What you spend your time looking at, is what goes into your heart and mind. And lets face it, women are not immune to lustfull glances at men; or to trying to garnish that from them. Jesus said "The eye is the lamp of the body." Matt. 6:22 What is illuminating your life?

Treat your spouse/others as Jesus would.
2Samuel 12:3-10 is the story that the Prophet Nathan told King David after his sin with Bathsheba and killing her husband. The lesson here is that the ewe lambs value to the poor man described in the story, is how precious your spouse is to God. From the male prespective this may make more sense; that they are to love and lead their wives. But we can still take the lesson and remember that God loves your spouse more than you'll ever be able to and can help you treat them with love and respect. Your sin does affect those closest to you. That's why this last part is in the plan. We have to move to loving behaviors that reflect a heart of obedience to Christ.

References:
tactics: securing the victory in every man's battle by Fred Stoeker
Family Life series: Every Man's Battle August 14-17/06