Why am I in this place anyway? Why do I have to go through this? Why can't I find peace? When will this start to make sense? How will I ever move beyond my pain?

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.
We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about the hardships we suffered in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many.
2 Corinthians 1:3-11 (emphasis mine)

OK. Let's be honest. None of us are facing death as Paul and his companions did. So, why do we then complain and whine and cry out for relief? Our pain is as real as we know and understand. What a comfort to know that I may not be able to handle that which God has given me - but Jesus can.

I wish that the comfort of others, the ability to teach others, the knowledge to lead souls to Christ, and the comfort of Jesus himself, did not come at such a high price. And yet the price he paid for me could never be matched. Never can I give him what he deserves for saving my selfish, sinful heart. All he wants is me, broken and bruised. In that lies the reason. Without my failures and struggles, I would not come to him at all.

Blessed be the name of the LORD! For he is good! I thank you LORD for that which brings me to my knees before you.