A story that needs to be told is never filled with everything good. There are sad difficult aspects and often there is tragedy and regret. No one wants to hear about some ones life that was perfect.

Perfect.

I'm not sure we understand what that word really means. Jesus was perfect - never did, said, or thought wrong. Was his life without pain, struggle, loss, and sadness? No; the perfect man dealt with all that perfectly. So, in our lives of imperfection; why do we expect a smooth free ride in life? Add the ridiculousness of our choices, the depravity that lies just beneath our smiling faces, and our lack of consistency in good behaviour, and we make the imperfect life almost unbearable. We do that; there is no one else to blame.

I'm grumbling.

Grumbling makes the time of trial a much worse nightmare. Charles Price said in his sermon 'The bitter water of Marah', that the Christians life is marked by triumph and trial, feast and fight, light and dark. He says the sooner we relent to this fact the less unhappy we will be. So, he says to ask yourself what is God saying to me in this time of testing, trial, fight, or darkness? Maybe the specific answer is elusive or just none of your business. We don't like that. How can God think that something affecting me, my life, my livelihood, my kids, my marriage, my reputation, be none of my business? My pastor, Doug, would ask me - 'How far will your faith take you?' I'm asking myself right now - 'The God you know, the faithful, trustworthy, saviour, loving, full of grace and mercy, and the most powerful Holy God, would He allow anything except what is best for you?'

I already know the answer.

Yet, I don't like the trial, the fight or the darkness. Who does really? After such great triumph to find ourselves once again choked by the cares of the world, worry, and even fear is disheartening. I went back and looked at a study I did a few years back - 'When Godly People do Ungodly Things' - it was then that I took up 2 Corinthians 10:5 which states, "... take every thought captive to obey Christ." All of my trouble right now only feels worse when I'm negative. And let's be truthful; our ungodly behaviour comes from our ungodly thoughts.

Lord, renew my mind (Romans 12:1-3), by the Holy Spirit's power, fill my thoughts with only what is good (Philippians 4:8), and even in this bitter place that I must be, show me how to drink so that it may be sweet to me (Exodus 15:22-27). May you cause me to go to the source of living water, Jesus; who has promised to those who believe, hearts with flowing rivers of living water (John 7:37-38).

I can feel the joy returning to me - well sort-of :)

I usually want to pray for a miracle that would make everything as it should be in just a few days. Maybe part of the point of the trial is to learn to be content in all circumstances. What a miracle that would be.

I found this in an old book that my grandmother gave to me about a year ago. It just fell out; and how timely as I seek God's will.

In the Bulb There Is a Flower
In the bulb there is a flower; in the seed, an apple tree;
In cocoons, a hidden promise: butterflies will soon be free!
In the cold and snow of winter; there's a spring that waits to be,
Unrevealed until its season, something God alone can see.

There's a song in every silence, seeking word and melody;
There's a dawn in every darkness, bringing hope to you and me.
From the past will come the future; what it holds, a mystery,
Unrevealed until its season something God alone can see.

In our end is our beginning; in our time, infinity;
In our doubt there is believing; in our life, eternity.
In our death, a resurrection; at the last, a victory.
Unrevealed until its season, something God alone can see.